"I took a certain pleasure in informing the gender clinic that even though their program told me I could not live as a Gay man, it looks like I'm going to die like one."

If you haven’t read about Lou Sullivan, you are missing out. Getting access to HRT and surgery was historically contingent on you presenting as heterosexual and conforming to rigid gender expectations. Lou fought against that, he fought for gay trans men, and really trans men in general.

I have a copy of his diaries, which inspire me when I read. It’s transness as desire rather than rejection. That above all the want to be a man, rather than the movement away from being a “woman.”