You can only get so excited about making someone else rich.
My mom after I finished some inane chores she'd force me to do when I was a kid:
"There that wasn't so bad was it? Don't you feel accomplished now, after a job well done?"
Me:
"1. Yes, it was. All of that sucked. 2. No. I feel like I want to be left alone. We will definitely struggle again next time you tell me to stop what I'm doing on a Saturday to mow your lawn for free, or whatever. "
I've since grown up and have my own lawn I neglect. But, I do understand the value of chores now. I just don't force them on others, and if I ask for help, it isn't a veiled threat that says "You say yes and help, or else..."
Dopamine after an accomplishment? Nah.
That's what the booze and blow are for.
That is actually one of the major things that medication changes for me - things other than my current hyperfocus can be rewarding. Mind you I still suck at choosing the right activity, but at least I stick with whatever I'm doing.
Or the feeling of , that should gave taken way less time, man I suck. Did I do it right? Better redo it (6 hours later...)
No ADHD, just autism here. When finishing I get a small relief and no accomplishment, just emptiness if anything. I have to revisit a job well done 6mo later to get the feeling of accomplishment for a job well done.
That's an interesting variation. I'm happy that get your fix eventually.
Yeah. I struggled to finish my graduation thesis, for many reasons, but chief among them was that I took on a project I didn't know I wasn't prepared for (it went way, waaay beyond what my education gave me, including economic and social issues I definitely was not prepared to explore, nevermind explain) and my supervisor was as inexperienced in it as I was. Me being the perfectionist that I am, being unable to produce what I imagined meant I'd rather do nothing.
Took me about 2y to get a decent research paper together (it really didn't need to take that long, it was a qualitative study on gentrification in my city), and by the time I was able to guilt myself into actually finishing it, I got a decent looking project in about 2 weeks, hyperfocusing through the absolute rage the entire thing was giving me. The terna (experts assigned to judge) loved it, from the research to the execution. I asked for the degree to be handed to me on site instead of through a ceremony. I was just absolutely done with it, lol.
I don't really feel proud about it even though I should be, I'm just glad I got through it at all.
its called anhedonia and its a symptom of many psychiatric issues. i had it for like 40 years and it got worse as my cptsd bloomed and i acquired depression that was treatment-resistant. it was severe. i had many meds and ect and ketamine. ketamine fuckin works but it takes a toll on my dissociative disorder and tbh my sense of what is real and it likely triggered the clinical paranoia. however, i now take atomoxetine and it fixes the anhedonia really well in comparison to before. now i get up and simple shit makes me feel good. not great, not ecstatic, just good. it turns out i can like everyday stuff. also, being trans with the wrong endogenous hormones also made it worse. so, to sum up, estradiol, lamictal, and atomoxetine are a magic combo for me. now its just life stress that makes me want to turn myself off. at least every single thing in my life is no longer a sisyphean grind like a real life mmo that never gives you coin or an epic.
Wait I thought that’s what accomplishment was?
I usually feel anger at myself that it took that long/wasn't better/something else my brain had decided to keep me from getting any good brain chemicals
I don't even get the sense of relief. I could stop 1 second short of finishing and feel no difference.
For me the relief comes from finally being able to let go of the guilt I felt for not getting it done before. Maybe you don’t feel guilty so you don’t get the relief after the guilt?
Im quite sure I dont have ADHD, and I can absolutely relate. When I finally wrote my last exam of my highschool everyone was kinda hyped afterwards and I was like "and now? That's it?"
I was quite sure I didn’t have ADHD, too.
Not feeling a sense of accomplishment is not normal. You deserve better. Just check into it, okay?
I'm no brainologist but I wonder if things like this might be more related to autistic cognition. There seems to be something similar in the space of not attaching the same significance to events others find emotionally charged.
"How much longer do I have to do this shit? I'm too afraid to live, and more afraid to die. Well, not afraid of a painless death. Fuck, I'm bored."
No finished project without some force that provided the focus to get it done.
How can any feeling of accomplishment fill the mind when there is the bad feeling of being forced?
Isn’t that one of the major symptoms of OCD?
ADHD and 'tism too.
I know the post is a joke but this has high impact on our lives. You don't develop a drive for certain things unless you feel rewarded. For a lot of us we put in all the work but never get the reward. It's fucking hell.
Well maybe if someone paid those MTX's you would get that sense of PRIDE and ACCOMPLISHMENT 😤😤
