As someone who has had to paint mini faces before, this isn't aweful, not great by any means but could have been much worse. They definitely need to thin their paints, probably use a smaller brush, and go slower. But in the person would painted this' defense, faces are so hard to do well, and even harder to fix if you fuck it up.
Painting them yourself is easier than ever though! Contrast paints and washes alone can accomplish amazing things. Trust me, if you've thought about trying, do it. You can absolutely do a better job than that in no time.
Laser scanning is possible, 6-axis milling machines exist and on a subminiature scale.
Why is there no 6-axis painting machine? I understand there are 3D printers that can do this, but 3D printing costs more than just making a die (or reusing a similar die from another model) at a certain scale.
Money. 6-axis isn't cheap to run or maintain, especially at this scale with the desired precision. Add in the inherent issues of working with a variety of paint colors (especially aerosolized), subtract the ability to mask features from over spray. Their prices would have to make Warhammer look bargain bin in order to recoup the costs of the machine, maintenance and consumables.
Archon Studios recently introduced a mayor new technology into the hobby with Prismcast. This "printer" basically paints curved 2,5 D surfaces which you glue together to make a fully 3D model. AFAIK there is no way to make this technology in 3D
(Judero is actually an amazing game and a work of art. Go play it, if you like the idea of a game made fully in clay + spare pieces laying around the creator's house)
The only one that actually looks bad is the one at the top of the article. The others look fine.
The one of the red woman (I haven't played the game so no idea who is who, edit: karlach, the tiefling) looks like it might be bad, but the pictures are also terrible so it's impossible to say.