DOGE Plans to Rebuild SSA Codebase in Months, Risking Benefits and System Collapse

Ah yes, a classic tale...

"We're going to take this perfectly efficient and functional COBOL code base and rewrite it in Java! And we'll do it in a few months!"

So many more competent people and organizations than them have already tried this and spectacularly crashed and burned. There are literal case studies on these types of failed endeavors.

I bet they'll do it in Waterfall too.

It's interesting. If they use Grok, this could well be the deathknell for vibe programming (at least for now). It's just fucking tragic that their hubris will cause grief and pain to so many Americans - and cost the lives of more than a few.

Edit: Fixed some typos.

There are only two reasons softwares goes for decades without being replaced:

1. It’s so unimportant that nobody uses it
2. It’s so important that the last major bug was squashed 15 years ago

How this will go:

DOGE: "Okay Grok. Convert this COBOL code into Python."

Dumb AI: "Certainly! Here you go."

System crashes and exposes all Americans' SSNs

DOGE: "Fuckin' DEI hires...!"

Australian here.

They are robbing you

This has the stench of junior engineer all over it. This rewrite will go way over budget and come limping across the finish line late, with more bugs and less features than the system it replaces. I guarantee it.

"ROFL"

Signed, everyone who has been involved in migrating a codebase before.

This is like a new programmer coming in to their new job, seeing the code isn't perfect and saying they could rebuild the entire thing and do it better in a month.

These comments are completely missing the truth.

They have zero intention of rebuilding anything, this is just an excuse to destroy SSA ...

I've worked on teams converting legacy code for most of my life. The planning for something like this would take longer than six months.

If this proceeds in Trump's corrupt government, Elon will get the contract, will claim it is too broken to salvage, and will privatize it. The only way this goes anywhere is if Trump and musk stand to gain money, and they stand to gain a lot.

This is just another step down "I honestly just can't comprehend the stupidity of what is going on in the American government"-alley...

Like... what do they even expect to come of this? Why are they even interested in doing it? Is it just to stir up shit?

Oh no, he wants to “rebuild the stack” from the ground up again.

i hope elon and the entire "doge" team dies. i really do.

"…but sir, we only know Node.js…"

Months? I don't k ow how to code, and even I know that's impossible.

step 1. rewrite into spaghetti code

step 2. nobody understands the new code, so the govt has to contract elon musk for code maintenance forever

step 3. profit

If it fails spectaculairly who will take the blame? Will there be any repercussions at all?

Or will Musk and Trump shrug their shoulders? Halfheartedly blame Biden for badly programming the original database then go play some golf/videogaminges?

COBOL is perfectly suitable for financial purposes for which it was designed. The SSA code has gone through decades worth of changes and improvements that cannot be replicated even in 10 years.

This clusterfck has me seriously considering whether taxes are quite as certain as death anymore.

In theory, it wouldn't be a necessarily bad idea to port the COBOL code to something more modern, but I cannot trust Muskrat and a few vibe coder youngsters with this task.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Ow, my sides.

Gonna blow up the database as many times as they blow up SpaceX rockets.

This idea is terrifying in the most insidious ways. Who has access to the code? Who is auditing the code? Are they putting in code that may disenfranchise "the right people". How long will it take to come to light? When found out, provided 'Adults' are running the country again, how much and how long would it take to fix it? And what backdoors are in the code?

This is bad news all around.

If SS payments stop, there will be hundreds of thousands of people with nothing left to lose.

This is how you know Musk is a fraud. This far into his career and he’s leading teams into rookie mistakes.

Or, he knows this will break it and that’s the goal. I’m just not sure how he avoids the blame.

I'm sure having a corrupt non-government narcissist rewrite the code for SS will be fine. It's not like he could leave any code hidden in there for his own purposes, like controlling or redirecting payments or anything.

risking guaranteeing

Hey asshole - it works - don't fix it.

That’s the idea. Then they say anyone who complains about not receiving benefits is a fraud.

Just adding. This and all the bad things that will happen if they get the green light, is not how this is done or should be done.

'But all the waste and ineficciency!' Hog wash.

From the system that is working? and serves thousands of people what they needed every day of every year.

They have to say it's horribly broken. Its a lie, but they have to justify why.

There are standards, procurement contracts, entire agency's to make sure --- Make sure what?

March 28, 2025 - Make sure that what will happen, doesn't.

coda: The trick this cabal is using is simple - take a thing most folk don't understand. Say it's broken. Open it. Rob it. Say its fixed. Collect profits and praise, leave town.

Wont happen legacy systems more complicated than expected, well it wont happen functionally....

The MuskRat should get Big Ballz and the boys to program a video game, so he can have a new revenue stream to replace Tesla when it goes bankrupt, which sure looks like the future of that company.

Rewrite it in Rust has gone too far 😆

Reminds me of that thing Lex Luthor did where he sponged off rounding errors in financial transactions

As long as Big Ballz is running things, I’m sure it will all be fine!

/s

If you want the source of any future "technical glitches", it's this wilfully negligent act. Courts, take note.

GitHub Copilot about to be clocking some overtime on COBOL conversions.

Russia just wants musks boy toys to cripple the only checks and balances putin thinks he has.