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Question for other trans folks on degendering and misgendering

They/themming someone exclusively who uses different pronouns is shitty and misgendering, but is it alright to use they/them for literally anyone in addition to the pronouns they use, leaning towards using their specific pronouns?

I'm in two camps. On one hand, I've always used language like this for cis people and I see this reflected in how other people speak and in the media. On the other hand, I know it sucks when someone only uses they/them for you.

So, what are your thoughts hexbear?

Edit: reminder that preferred pronouns when you just mean someone's pronouns is antiquated language

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2 comments
  • I don't like they/them being used for me. If there's confusion, that's fine, but once I've clarified my pronouns that should be the end of they/them

  • I use they/them for people I don't know the preferred pronouns of and once I'm told, I use their preferred pronouns. Recently had someone at work just refer to me as "they" which was really out left field since I've been there long enough for all the regular staff to know better so it definitely felt more like a slight than someone just not assuming.