I made a realization about why it's so frustrating to explain ADHD to neurotypical people.
I was chatting with a friend and tried to convey how crippling a really bad day (for me at least) can be. I needed tangible examples that really drive the point home. So I started making a list.
Sensory Overload: In a room filled with flashing lights, loud overlapping music, and strong scents, read a few book pages without stopping.
Physical Restlessness: Try to stay standing with elastic bands around your legs and arms, as they slowly pull away and begin to stretch.
Memory Maze: While navigating an obstacle course, remember a series of numbers or words. At the end, recall the series in the correct order.
Time Blindness Race: Complete a task without access to a clock or timer. While periodically being rushed or falsely warned of time running out
I realized that if I were to do any combination of these to a person all at once, it starts to fulfill the legal defenition of torture.
That's when it hit me.
It's so frustrating because it can be so intensely afwul, and you know that if they were to experience it for a day, they would be a crying mess by the end of it. Granted, these examples are extreme, and I'm sure someone out there could do these and be fine. But how long could they keep it up? It may be easier some days, but others it is truly debilitating.
This is probably old news for some, but I've only recently had to talk to people about it. It makes me so angry that they can just blow it off. Lucky for me my friend is very empathetic and understood what I was trying to get across.
How would you explain green to someone who has no concept of colour? The basic otherness of neurodiversity is simultaneously the defining characteristic, overarching difficulty, and blocker to understanding by neurotypicals. I very much like these ideas on how to make the effect of this affliction relatable to others.
You might also ask them to play this little game (takes 5 mins) about a little adhdinosaur who is really, really trying to do his best. However, as good as this game is, it may be too whimsical for its own good as people might not take it serious. Yes, the idea is to give the player a sense of frustration, but there's not really anything there to make them think deeply about why and how this affects people like us. But at least, the game page links to a "making of" presentation by the author, as well as other games and resources for/by neurodiverse folk.
I'm not diagnosed with any form of neurodivergence (I hesitate to say neurotypical. I just manage any "weirdness" well enough to get by).
I played the dinosaur game for a little while. With the exception of the "notes" suddenly becoming a huge mess, it just feels like "Gaslighting: The Game". I get the frustration, but I agree that it doesn't help me understand ADHD any better.
Gaslighting is actually pretty close in terms of what short term memory issues are like. Except you can never be sure if it's just ADHD brain, or something is actually different.
I saw a video once with an expert on the subject who said that ADHD is misnamed, it should be called Intention Deficit Disorder, because the real main side effect is that all of the things that you intend to do are made difficult to impossible because of a variety of factors that affect your executive function.
That was quite likely Dr. Russell Barkley you saw.
Just the first 56 seconds of this video (by one of the foremost researchers) explains 100% of what the problem with adhd is. Symptomatically, adhd isn't even named for what it does to a person. Instead it's named for how it inconveniences others. Gee, thanks! I bet it was the same person who named the speech impediment "lisp". Jerk. 😅