Trans people with accepting parents: How did your relationship change?
Hello there. Angry parents stories are sadly more common, but I remember reading back on Reddit a heartwarming story about a dad who accepted fully his daughter. So while we all know how "bad" relationships usually go, I'm curious to hear about people who had love and support in their journeys.
My father is accepting, but in a very stoic “never mention it ever again” sort of way. Short (but heartfelt) written notes in cards at holidays and 2-3 minute calls on the weekend tell me he loves me, but our relationship became noticeably more strained after I came out and changed my name.
I'm not sure where my folks stand, so thanks for creating this thread. It's nice to see some good out there, it gives me hope. :)
I've come out to them, and they said, ostensibly, the right things. "We love you and want you to be happy, whatever that looks like." But then the rest of the weekend I was with them they proceeded to act like the conversation never happened and made no attempt to use the correct name and pronouns.
Fingers crossed, the next visit with them goes better. I'm prepared to do some gentle corrections this time, now that they've had some time to mull on it.
I've never been really "that" close to my parents, we got along really well but I never talked to them or knew much about them. Didn't help that I'm autistic and took some time to really get social and talkative.
But after I transitioned when I saw they were accepting it felt like a fresh start and I now have a mother/daughter relationship on a level that I never knew. My mom confides in me, tells me stuff my dad doesn't know, etc. And it's great to finally have this relationship now that I'm older and more mature, so I can talk to them on the same level.
My parents have been super accepting and sweet. My grandmothers were both dipshits about it so i stopped talking to them completely and i dont miss them. I text my parents a lot and have a good relationship with them showing off my progress and happiness.
I actually got closer to my parents since I stopped being a repressed dick head.
It's mostly business as usual. They supported me real hard during the tough times, and did a lot of their own research and asked questions on how best to go about things. My dad will fuck up pronouns from time to time, but it's more in a sense that he still calls his current dog by the old ones name if that makes sense.
Honestly, for my mom, I think the switching genders thing was easier for her to get used to than me becoming vegetarian lmao
Yeah, my parents are pretty great. The funny thing is I think they expected me to change a lot but I'm really the same. Plus it got my mom really involved in local LGBT things which is swag.
I’m a gay cis-man with a trans sister and we’re lucky my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles are all supportive. My grandma has even corrected herself misgendering my sister by accident. My husband also has a gay sister who has been married for 15+ years. There are families out there that are accepting and filled with queer people!
Honestly, not much, but that's a good thing.
I'm maybe a bit closer with my mom, but we where always close. My dad is as he always was: he cares, but is rather distant. Our relationship is a bit better than it used to, but it's more because of time, and because I don't live with my parents, so we don't see each other that often anymore.
Not exactly out to my parents, but overall I'd say they're fairly accepting? One mom is fairly eggy and repeats some right-wing talking points sometimes, but she'll go out of her way to give compliments when presenting in ways that don't conform to AGAB-expectations. The other mom (stepmom), I have no complaints. But since I'm not out, the only changes is things like stepmom asked if I identify as a woman. Amab NB, so I said "no", but I appreciate that they tried.
I think I got pretty lucky all things considered. My parents tend to lean conservative and religious. However when I told them, they were surprisingly open to it. I will admit it's taken them quite a bit of time and even a year out they still misgender me or deadname me accidentally, but I try not to be too hard on them. Strangely enough my mom was more supportive in the begining, but she seems to have pulled back as time went on, whereas my dad has went full in on support which certainly wasn't what I was expecting. Despite this I feel like our relationship has changed significantly for the better. I'm more open and honest to them now that I don't have to hide who I am, and they've shown that they love and support me in whatever ways they can. I certainly didn't expect for them to be so open and loving.
I don't think it makes a "good story", but my parents have accepted me.
My uncle is an established child psychology reaearcher (had been "chief psychologist" and "assistant director" at multiple children's hospitals. When I came out, they reached out to my uncle to ask for advice (especially for how sudden it appeared to them, when it was literally since I was a young teen for me), which he basically replied "if [dead name] is talking to you about this, it's something they've been dealing with for a long time". I think this helped them a lot
My parents took some time to come to terms with my transition. They struggled with my new name and using the right pronouns, but they put in the work, and we have a fairly solid relationship now. We were never super close (still aren't), but I have no qualms giving them a call sometimes, or spending holidays with them.