Lots of times the restaurants won't even have milk

and the options are sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, or water

I feel like this joke would have landed better 5, or maybe even 3 years ago. Every even remotely fancy restaurant I go into has jumped on the mocktail bandwagon and offers plenty of options for people avoiding alcohol.

Some this has to do with shelf life. Beverages containing alcohol have a long shelf life. A restaurant is not going to take losses on having 50 kinds of juice or whatever on hand. Another angle to this is that a lot of the drinks on the alcoholic menu are cocktails, so just combinations of other shit they have. Finally, what adult is just drinking milk? Have some water, it is good for you.

Who fucking drinks milk when they go to a restaurant - are you 5?

To be fair, how many baby cows are even coming to these restaurants??

What's a milk drinker like you doing out here? Go home to your mother.

The worst is when mocktails cost as much as cocktails. Like a non alcoholic whiskey sour will be $13, Shirley Temples are like $10

At least from my experience in NYC

This is my favorite thread, just everyone arguing over milk

There’s the trend of restaurants having “mocktails”, which is cool, but they often charge for them based on their price for alcoholic beverages. I don’t really want a special lemonade for $14.

me: i'd like a glass of milk

them: sorry that's only on the kids menu

me: you mean you can't pour me a glass of milk unless i order from a special menu? what if i wanted coffee

them: oh then we can bring you milk

me: ok then i'll order a coffee and just have the milk

them: sorry can't do that.

Adults: Look at these tiktok kids eating tide pods!

Also adults: Waiter please pour me a glass of your finest toxin!

Alcohol gives me the shits. Milk gives me the shits. I’d rather just have water.

You don't like water?

Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

Milk? Is this one of the McPoyles???

Lol, this is especially the case when it's my turn to be the designated driver in the group 🤣

At least I'll stay hydrated! Hydrohomies for life!

It’s about money. People are okay paying way higher margins for alcoholic drinks. They want you drinking alcohol for profits and the inebriating effect makes you more likely to spend loosely.

I stopped drinking about five years ago, and I often can find a mocktail or two that I like on most menus

Wouldn't they have milk available for coffee? Unless they only offered cream, I guess.

Either way, silly that you couldn't order some.

In my experience, it's usually the same length or alcoholic ones get almost a page long. Though I did go to one where the non-alcoholic options consisted solely of sodas, shame.

And the alcohol lists never have prices which is a clear indication that they know they are asking too much money.

Worked in restaurants for decades and never had a place not have milk available. It's used in lots of recipes and a lot of the places had Lil cartons for kids, also every drink was available "virgin" if you wanted a cocktail without booze, or we would have apple juice, orange juice, etc. I have never seen a restaurant that does not have a wide selection of non alcoholic drinks. Do you want them to list Arnold Palmers or are you asking for every type of non alcoholic seltzers or non alcoholic ciders or non alcoholic beers? Most restaurants have one or two but the non drunks don't drink 6 non alcoholic beers so it's just not worth the cost and room of keeping a large amount of non alcoholic pre made drinks. So stop complaining and have a water like a real man

Of course they have milk! With vodka and some Kalua/Bailey's!