When I was traveling all over the world for work, I learned really quickly to skip the local BBQ joint when I was in the south. They pretty much universally mediocre if not flat out bad.
Now the local burger and malt shop in the upper Midwest. Count me in.
In the southeast at least best BBQ is always the dude cooking in a kettle drum thing in the Publix parking lot. I don't eat meat anymore and have lived in California for a long time now (which has other great food but not really much of a BBQ culture) but I still think about those Florida parking lot meats from time to time.
SoCal native here the best BBQ youll find is in the parking lot of some gas station in the mountains or out in the desert. Just some dude with a smoker set up in the parking lot.
Been everywhere from Texas across to the Atlantic. I was meeting dealers and farmers. So both in the cities and small towns. I would fly in somewhere then drive all over the place and grab lunch wherever the local farmer or dealer we were meeting wanted to eat.
Yeah, I got taken out to the "best BBQ that you just have to try" so many times across the region. They are all very proud of it, and is all bleh...
You've gotta factor taste into it. Just because they were farmers from around there doesn't mean they know what tastes good. Having those people for relatives all my life and having tried every restaurant they swear up and down is delicious (and eaten their food at Thanksgiving), I've accepted that they don't have very...let's say complex palates. Sometimes I think that if the food is literally just cooked with any amount of sauce/seasoning they think it's good.
There are a few little holes in the wall that are the life-changing BBQ you've heard about, I promise. I've had them and consider them my benchmarks for good BBQ. Just don't take random small town guy's word for what's good because he might not know shit (could honestly say that for most people). Also, look for it in shacks that look a little sketchy in very small towns. Like <5000 people small.