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A tire valve stem removal tool is a few dollars.
A knife is way better and u probably already have one
Knife is not way better, it's actually a pretty dangerous way to deflate a tire.
Four nice sturdy nails placed strategically, pointy end up, immediately behind each tyre. Be content to know that justice will come when the time is right.
Make sure to put them on the corner of the tire, then it won't be repairable and they it will need a new tire.
Strike-anywhere match heads are ~⅛" wider than the space between the pin and collar of said valves, and are far cheaper. The slow leak is nearly imperceptible — until all wheels are flat simultaneously. 🫠
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