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How to know you'll turn out trans?

Hey there,

I recently found out Kris Tyson is now trans. She had a wife and a child before the transition. This kind of made me wonder. How can anyone be sure they won't turn out trans? Like what made you (to any trans people out there) make the switch?

To add a little context. I am a man, straight maybe a tiny bit bi. I have a some traits/interests that would typically be "reserved" (please excuse my terminology here and there) for women.

For instance, I dance a lot. I have even started ballet dancing. And in the past I had an eating disorder. Now I know this may sound a kind of bigoted or stereotypical. But I don't mean it that way, this is purely based on statistics.

However I feel in no way that I am in the wrong body. I like being a man, I like the idea of masculinity, and I like being a man who dances. (Okay granted, I did not like the eating disorder)

But it makes me "worried" if I do end up trans when I already have a wife and children. I want to know before I get all of that done you know what I mean? Tyson probably wanted too, now that I think about it.

Bottom line: How did most trans people know they were trans?

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  • You can't BECOME trans, you only find out that you are trans, and come out as such as a result.

    • I like "realize". I knew there was such a thing as a "sex change surgery" and even looked into it from a technical perspective because it intrigued me. It's fantasized about moving to a new city and getting one; starting over.

      I'd heard an offhand version of David Reimer's story as kind of a conservative horror story. I'd seen movies and tv shows make plenty of fun of people who "pretended" to be "the wrong sex". Monty Python's "lady penis" scene still pops into my head sometimes.

      I knew trans people existed and I'd seen a couple of people with "they/them" on their name badge. But I never really put together that those things were "real" in a meaningful way, or applicable to me and my experiences.

      So then I kind of realized what it all meant.

      • I was transphobic myself (living in a transphobic country my whole life kinda influenced my younger self), but once I knew exactly what being trans was all about, I immediately became a trans ally. Hell, I don't even conform to my own gender (I am male).

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