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A lot of people don’t understand bipolar disorder, or schizoaffective disorder specifically in my case. “Had” being incorrect, as it’s a lifelong illness.
I understand bipolar disorder (though as an observer). Emotional lag is the worst kind of lag.
I'm not sure how much of schizoaffective disorder I understand, but a friend of mine has it and know some of their experience.
Schizoaffective disorder is a terrifying and a lonely illness, so I hope that your friend doesn't suffer too much — my heart goes out to them. I have my wife to help me when I need her, but I have otherwise chosen to isolate myself and handle it on my own. I take my meds, I take care of my mind and body, and I attend therapy to get the tools I need. I have always fought my own battles and I don't think anyone can actually help me, nor could I ever bring myself to put that burden on anyone. I have my journal, the gym, my running shoes, and my workshop, plenty of healthy ways to get help without burdening anyone who doesn't know what they're signing up for.
Sorry about that, my friend. Remember, you're always welcome here. Sending lots of hugs.
Much appreciated.
Bipolar isn't so bad: If you're down or manic just be patient and you'll be back to awesome again 👍. It's the promise you must keep to yourself and the older you get the better you'll get at it.
Schizoaffective disorder means that no one has power over you but you. Seriously, other much more sensitive people could off themselves because of something someone said but not you. Your emotional barrier is tough AF. You're incredibly difficult to scam and a social engineer's worst nightmare. You don't fall for emotional trickery.
I wouldn't go so far as to say that "bipolar isn't so bad," because it sure can be. However, I have stopped whining, complaining, and lamenting. I have accepted my illness. I take my medication and I try to live my best life.
Schizoaffective disorder is a much greater challenge, but again, I have accepted it. I bear this cross and no matter what happens, you're right, I have power over myself. I may not always have full control over my mental faculties, but I have been through the hell of my mind turning on itself. What are the trivialities of life compared to that?
Life sucks for us all in different ways. I do not think I have it worse than anyone else, just tough in my own way. We each must deal with our own challenges.
As somebody with schizoaffective, I don't understand where you're coming from saying it means I'm the only one with power over myself. In fact, I've found even after being well medicated I'm incredibly easy to manipulate. All you have to do is tell me somebody's trying to control me and instantly I've spun a 2000 foot deep web about how they're doing it. Then you just tell me you have the solution and suddenly I'm eating out of your hand.
And my emotional barrier is paper thin. I only look unaffected by things. In reality if I'm the slightest bit scared or upset, I'm breaking down inside and spinning another web to fill in the cracks. My whole existence is built on delusions and lies I've built up to keep myself together, such that even now that I'm in a place where I theoretically could start breaking them down and rebuilding properly, I won't, because I'd fall apart, and I can't handle that.
I've decided to just be happy being fucked up. Not because that's right, but because that's the only thing I can survive.
I'm incredibly easy to manipulate
Then let me manipulate you into being happy 👍
Dark Voodoo Intensifies
I like your positivity.
Luckily, I am happy most of the time nowadays, just, y'know, in spite of my disorder.
A close friend of my deals with schizoaffrctive disorder. One of the greatest guys I know, but it definitely has a huge impact on his life.
High five! Schizoaffective, type 2 bipolar. And some BPD sprinkled on top. Recently I got some changes in my meds and I finally got days when I'm mostly emotionally stable. Is this how people feel? Made me cry. I wish the best for you.
Same to you. I also have some BPD (another horribly misunderstood illness!) to deal with, but I'm old enough and in a stable relationship, so I think most of it is in remission. Bless my wife, because wow. I was a horrible person to deal with when I was younger.
Be well!