If you could explain to your 19 year old self what you are doing with your life today, what would they say?
If you could explain to your 19 year old self what you are doing with your life today, what would they say?
If you're not middle aged, pick a younger age, IDK
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"Yeah you probably should have jumped off that bridge".
:(
Are you OK? Have you got access to some kind of therapy?
I'm fine.
I've been in and out of therapy most of my life. Therapists are useless (for me). Not once have they told me something I didn't already know. I know why I respond to things the way I do. I know where the trauma started. I know what copeing mechanism I've developed and how they can effect relationships.
Keeping a journal doesn't help. Meditation doesn't help. All the various other bullshit they have tried since I was a kid have been terrible.
Medication makes my brain feel like molasses which makes me wanna step into oncoming traffic even more so than normal.
It is what it is.
That sucks dude. I hope some change shows up for you at some point.
Unlikely.
If I didn't have friends and family it would hurt I would have done it years ago.
I won't do that to all of them though. I didn't jump off that bridge after all. So for now I just kinda pray a random accident kills me instantly. I don't wanna be a vegetable that they have to take care of, but if a brain aneurysm or some other act of God takes me out that would be whatever.