So pissed off with myself. I bought a Squishmallow a while back thinking it would cheer me up but all I can think of is how much it cost and I’m afraid to get it dirty. I could have sewn something myself from an open source pattern if I wanted something that bad.
Same with the old secondhand tv. I hoped it would help to get dvds to watch but it’s awkwardly large for my space and I wouldn’t have had to pay if I’d been more careful and didn’t let my original tiny one get nicked.
Also my energy bills are higher than they should be because disability leads to using a lot of hot water for pain management and a (low efficiency secondhand) dryer to reduce the exertion of tasks.
Don’t get me started on the food deal…
I’m managing ok still but am getting really irritated at the areas I’m not able to min-max. It feels so wasteful.
I know you know this logically but in case it helps to hear it from another voice -
Enjoy the damn squishmallow. You are allowed little comforts. Little sources of pleasure and joy are as important for survival as security and health needs. No-one should struggle for any of them and it's a disgrace on our species that anyone does.
But do not let yourself be sucked into the myth of the "saintly poor". You are allowed these things and you are amazing at making your resources stretch. Every now and then you have to try to let even that go just for a bit and let the warm water and the little comforts refill your cup. It's actually necessary.
Spoilered in case you don't want any more comment.
Thanks. I’m just kind of in this mindset that every dollar I don’t spend on luxuries is another dollar I’ll have to withstand the next unexpected financial hit.
I remember reading when you got the squishmallow. The boys were given really nice super Mario plushes for their birthday last year and they're almost so good you don't want to do anything with them. Especially something plush where you don't know how it will turn out after a trip through the washing machine.
I hope you can find a way to enjoy it and make the most of the TV you have. It sucks when our plans don't work out the way we intend
Oh they have Squishmallow pet beds… they don’t seem to be in Australia otherwise I’d be tempted. Very soft and squishy to support Melbcat’s sore old bones…
If I can work out the fabric and get a pattern maybe she’d like that