Your early relationship with your caregivers sets the stage for how you will build relationships as an adult. Your attachment style shows how you relate to other people.
Tl;dr attachment styles are definitely a thing however it’s not set in stone. You can start doing things like going to therapy, medication, self-reflect to identify where you can do better.
I’m disorganized - been diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder and cPTSD. I have the usual depression and anxiety. Just last year I found out the true root of the problem is undiagnosed ADHD and my whole family probably has it.
When I started dating my now husband I did horrible things to him. I emotionally abused him. I would get angry for reasons I wouldn’t tell him. Just take off and walk around the city and feel good that he was looking for me.
It’s only from the grace of the spaghetti monster that he didn’t give up on me. In 2008 I started to go to therapy on and off and our relationship got better. it was finally in 2018 that i decided to seek real help. Now I am on a cocktail of meds, happy, and alive.
My husband is the MVP of our relationship! We’ve been together 23 years and married for 17 of them. :)