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Annnnnnnnd…it’s fake.
(I’m aware I’m fact checking a shitpost, but wow people just instantly believe shitposts, so here we are.)
It is a deliberately deceptive shitpost, most of the humor is based on the assumption the article is real.
Gosh dang it! Stop stealing our dreams!
Edit: I just clicked the link. Damn, man. Two people's lives destroyed in an instant. How hard does this eyebrow dude hit? Is he a professional boxer or something?
It’s easier than you think. Most often it’s when they fall and hit their head on the ground after being knocked out.
Some drunk dude wanted to fight me at a nightclub once so I went outside to smoke a cigarette and give him some space. He followed me outside and swung on me. I just dodged his drunk-ass hook, and he spun himself all the way around, lost his balance, and fell. When he fell his head hit a brick planter, and the sound it made was disturbing. I do not think he was okay. But I didn't stick around to find out. I didn't even touch him, so I just went back inside. I saw an ambulance out there some time later, and I'm assuming it was for Mr. Drunk boxer guy. He kicked his own ass.
Darnold told deputies that he walked into the convenience store and bought cigarettes. When he walked out, Aryafar asked him for a "smoke." Darnold offered him a cigarette, but Aryafar allegedly wanted weed.
When he said he didn't have any to sell, the two said expletives to one another and moved on.
Moments later, Amir allegedly walked toward the car Dardnold was in. He got out of the vehicle, punched Aryafar once, which knocked him down, and then got back in the car with his girlfriend and drove off.That story of Dar(d)nold and Ayafar has somehow more typos than the shitpost. At least it isn't AI.