Chat @beehaw.org lemillionsocks @beehaw.org 1y ago

Buying a house is so disheartening

Been trying to buy a house because my rent is going up(and it will continue to do so) and a mortgage would be around the same as what my rent will become in a few years anyway so I figure I might as well build equity and have a house for my family.

Thing is the current housing market is nuts. Houses are put on sale with strict deadlines of "accepting all offers due 12pm 5 days from now" creating a false sense of urgency and to top is off the process is super opaque. You dont know what other people are offering so unlike an actual auction you cant start low and hopefully get a good value. Nope it's a black box and the asking price isnt of any help because that was just an advertising tactic to get more people to look at the house.

So you have to do research based on past history of other homes sold in the area of the same type recently and then place a competitive bid based on that. Of course everyone else is also doing that so you have to make your bid "competitive" and give a little more. How much more is hard to say and you only really get the one bid. So 12 pm comes along and the anticipation in your stomach is insane because this could be it you could be a homeowner and you did put in a competitive bid, and then sometime between immediately and just before bed you get a message saying they went with another offer.

ITS SO DAMN FRUSTRATING! Houses that I bid $30,000 over asking price and someone still swooped in and bid even more. And of course since the process is a black box you dont get told what bid beat you out or what the other bids were(dont want the 2nd place bid to decrease their bid in the event the 1st place falls through). You'll find out eventual final sale price a few months from now when everything finishes closing. I imagine the issue is other people got frustrated with the game over the last few months and now if they see a house thats ok they go all in with their max offer instead of a smart offer.

Oh and the market is limited, but somehow out of sheer coincidence after one round of sales is done the realtors manage to find another round of homes to put on the market. I'm convinced the realtors are limiting the supply on purpose and letting homes trickle in because the ACT NOW PUT IN THE BEST OFFER OVER ASKING tactic probably doesnt work as well if there are more than a handful of homes for sale at a time.

Its so frustrating I just want a house to live in and raise my soon to be born child, and Im willing to pay you what you're asking for it! The worst part is the housing market in my area shot up a lot over the years. So these people playing bid wars are making 100k profit AT LEAST for a house they bought just 5 years ago! And then theres the old people who bought the house for pretty much nothing 30+ years ago

Sorry for my long wall of text rant

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I’m not sure if this is something that’s helpful, but I do want to give the advice that real estate really isn’t the best way to build wealth If you are very disciplined. Renting can be an even better way of building wealth.

If you treat housing a service you pay for, buying a house has a higher overall cost if you include mortgage, taxes, insurance, repairs, and etc. Remember, mortgage is the least you'll pay, while rent is the most you'll pay.

Imagine if your mortgage was 2k/mo, taxes, insurance, and home maintenance is another 500/mo, you can almost certainly find a house to rent for under that cost (let's say 2k/mo for example) unless you live in one of the exceptionally cheap places in the US where the price-to-rent ratio is low <15.

Now also consider how you most likely needed a 20% down, and most of your payment goes towards interest initially for a mortgage.

The tricky part is having the financial discipline to put away that extra 500/mo into investments. Mortgage FORCES you to save into an appreciating asset, most people will just blow that extra 500/mo onto other items. It sounds like you already are by maxing out your 401k, and I would also looking into maxing Roth IRA if you can. Home ownership isn't the only path towards wealth, though it is a means by which many people (conscious or not) force themselves into "saving".
- From a practical financial perspective, you are correct. However, owning a property provides long term security. It also insulated you from rising rent prices for 30 years. There is a certain peace of mind that comes with knowing you have complete control over your own shelter. While there are risks associated with that, you can mitigate that pretty effectively provided that
  
  you make a smart purchase to begin with. Identify major issues and make a conscious decision whether you want to own those problems, or walk away.
  
  Conduct regular, proper preventative maintenance to head off problems before they get bad.
  
  Have decent insurance
  
  While someone that rents indefinitely does avoid a lot of the risk of ownership, they also tied the cost of their shelter to something outside of their control. Sure, it's cheaper than owning right now, but how will rent prices in 10-15 years compare to the cost of ownership of a property purchased today?
  
  I do think it is an effective hedge against increased cost of living in your particular area, and swapping that out for other risks such as natural disaster, long term climate and political disaster, and increases in interest or insurance costs, but I don’t think most people see it that way from a financial perspective.
  
  From a market average perspective, your earnings in the market will far outweigh normal increases in rental cost in the long term. Property tax, insurance, and cost of home maintenance are also going to increase as cost of living increases.
  
  I do 100% agree there is a psychological benefit to home ownership that might even extend to the foundation of American middle-class democratic values.
  
  All valid points, with the possible exception of your comment about earnings increases against rental costs.
  
  Ultimately, it's likely a wash with the slight edge towards renting in terms of value. Personally, the psychological benefits of ownership outweigh the downsides. Add to it that once my house is paid off, my cost of living drops immensely, which can be a major factor in an early retirement.
- If you treat housing a service you pay for, buying a house has a higher overall cost if you include mortgage, taxes, insurance, repairs, and etc.
  
  You realize that renters also pay for those things via rent, right? Landlords are not charities.
  
  Not sure how that changes my argument.
  
  If you look at the rental market in the United States, it’s cheaper to rent than it is to own if you take into consideration the opportunity cost of money when it is not invested in the higher growth equities market from a purely financial perspective.
  
  Farming isn’t a charity either but it’s usually more efficient for people to not work as farmers tilling their own land.

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