Our minds work in mysterious ways, that’s for sure. I‘m thankful that I haven’t hit rock bottom for quite a while. It doesn’t hurt to know whom you can reach out to when you do though.
I have been that low a couple of times, and my current mentality has managed to get me out. It's astounding how close it is, somewhat like an unrefined version of self-help books which advise you to get up after getting to such a point.
Also the fact that I have no one to rely on might have made this a coping mechanism.