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The third political party in the US should be The Woodchipper. You don't vote for candidates, just The Woodchipper. If The Woodchipper gets the majority of votes, all the candidates on the ticket get tossed in a fucking woodchipper and we start the election over with new candidates.
This fixes our problems, in a uniquely American way.
Televise this, just as Carlin intended.
Who gets to throw them in?
Woodchucks
They're still bitter about Groundhog Day. I say, let them have it.
A lottery is the only fair system
This is, indeed, a more realistic solution for America than, let's say, let the president have less power. Or getting rid of the electoral college.
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