Super Shark (2011)

Super Shark is a 2011 science fiction comedy horror film directed by Fred Olen Ray and starring John Schneider, Sarah Lieving, and Tim Abell.[1] The film follows a marine biologist named Kat Carmichael, played by Sarah Lieving, who has to investigate and survive the rampage of a mutated primordial shark.
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The Lexikon des internationalen Films - Filmjahr 2012 found that the special effects in the film were too poor for it to compete with Godzilla productions.[2] The Geman book Die 100 schlechtesten Filme aller Zeiten-Das große SchleFaZ-Buch included it in its list of the 100 worst films of all time.[3]
However, various reviews found that precisely because of its extremely unconvincing production, the film remains entertaining.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Shark

• I watched this on tubi: https://tubitv.com/movies/100034043/super-shark
• looks like it's also on youtube! fear not, this account claims to license their movies: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw6-z_U6XEI
• ublock origin on firefox oughta work blocking ads on both those links!

Maybe you got an investor. Maybe you can afford a washed-up actor or two. And a couple c-listers who are between Lifetime Movie and tv commercial gigs. And a bunch of bikini models who'll work for exposure. Maybe your cousin who owes you a favor knows how to do graphics on their gaming computer. What kind of movie you going to do? Sharks, man, everybody loves sharks. Whip up the script in a Starbucks and let's get ready to party!

So one of the washed up actors is John Schneider, who played one of the Duke boys in the Dukes of Hazzard. He's not the best actor in the world, but he knows what he's doing.

The other washed up actor is Jimmie Walker, famous for playing JJ in the 70s tv show "good times". Jimmie was apparently on a tighter schedule bc he's got the standalone kind of role that was written up so it could be filmed seperately from everyone else's. They dress him up like a P-Funk groupie and let him say 'dyno-mite" a lot. He plays a DJ who runs a bikini contest which has very little to do with the rest of the movie, bc that's the kind of movie this is.

Anyway, there's this shark who can crawl on land for Reasons, and eventually they call out the Army (in this case represented by 4 soldiers and a commanding officer). No, wait, they also have a WALKING TANK! The graphics look like they were rendered in Unreal Tournament, but it's actually not a bad idea, for a B-movie. They should have called this "Super Shark meets the Walking Tank" or something. You're leaving money on the table, folks.

Oh wat else.... there's a very brief subplot with a couple lifeguards, and the scientist lady who's investigating all this has some kind of backstory... and there's even a bit of an anti-corporate story here... tbh the parts that show the shark attacking, those are moderately entertaining, in a laughable kind of way... If you're at the bar talking to your buddies and there's a TV on, this wouldn't be too bad to be playing there, if the sound was off... you'd be like: is that a land shark? wtf are they saying there? and your buddy would be like: don't worry about it, you're prolly better off not knowing... And they'd be right!

for more pictures look here: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1698008/mediaindex/